Everyday People

I have had the same running mix on my ipod for the past year - a total of 67 songs, some of which are great to run to (Mercy by Duffy - who can't break out sprinting to that one!?!?) while others are ones that I just like (Shattered by OAR) to ones that bring back memories (Everyday People by Sly and the Family Stone). After this song plays every time I am left thinking the last line of the song: different strokes for different folks.

Today that got me thinking about life as a journey. Right now I am in what I consider a rut as far as diabetes goes. I am a perfectionist and cannot stand a reading on the meter above 150 and dislike the 140s. I know that the more I test, the better control I have and can stay in my favorite zone of 80-100. Except, now I often find myself lacking the motivation to test my blood sugar and find myself just guessing as to what my blood sugar is and doing what I deem necessary. What happened to all of my motivation last year? It is like it just decided to exit my life. I need and want to get it back, but can't figure out how.

It reminds me to when I was a junior in college. Everyday during this time of the year I ran 10 miles. It didn't matter how I felt, I just did it. Some days were better than others and I could clip off the miles at a good pace, while other days were quite the struggle. I didn't do a mile more or less: it was always 10. I was in good shape then but couldn't push myself to conquer more, to run more, to be better.

This is the bottom line: I am frustrated. I am frustrated with myself. I am not just an ordinary, everyday person like Sly might think I am. I need to rediscover the wonderful, legend-in-my-own-mind person that I am.